Welcome to The Gentleman's Guide
There’s a certain time in everyone’s life when you realize what you learned from your childhood. As I always say, you only learn two things in life. What TO-DO and what NOT TO-DO. For me, that time is now and I can honestly say I’ve learned a great deal of both. This “realization” for some people may take a lifetime. For me, it took 28 years. The most important thing is that you reach that point. Because when you do, you will understand why you do the things you do. Most importantly, you can make an intentional effort to change so that you can be your best self not only for you but for those who love and depend on you.
Being a husband and father are by far two of my greatest accomplishments. I have an amazing, beautiful wife (Gabrielle) and two beautiful boys (Brandon Jr. & Wesley). Like many young fathers, becoming my best self will have a monumental impact on the lives of my wife and children. I chose to use the word “becoming” because there’s always something to improve on. Life is ever-changing and we can never limit ourselves to the present version of ourselves. My point is to embrace change.
"Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power" Abraham Lincoln
The phrase "embrace change" sounds so cliche' but it's something that I’ve learned the last few years first hand. As I’ve heard many times, we are creatures of habit. So when life gives me a situation that colors outside of the lines, I will most likely revert back to what I’ve learned growing up. In many situations, this reversion has served me well, but the older my 3 brothers and I have gotten, the more we’ve realized that unlearning a lot of what we saw or thought was normal was something that would be vital to us becoming the men we need to be; to be examples of what a true GENTLEMEN looks like no matter how many L's we've taken. To me, a true gentleman can come back from any downfall. It's when things are not all "easy peasy" is when ones character is truly tested. Often times the best opportunities will take us out of our comfort zones. While naturally, we can be apprehensive towards uncertainty, these are the times where we start to evolve out of what we consider the norm.
What is a Gentleman?
So you may be wondering, what is considered a true gentleman? Well, most would say a man that exhibits good manners. Some may attribute "gentleman-ship" with how one carries himself or how he dresses. With my personalized definition, I've taken it a step further than just manners and a man's wardrobe. Like I've stated before on my IG page, I used to believe that part of being a MAN means you "go to work." Our society says (traditionally), men go to work and "pay the bills." If a man did these things, he's serving his purpose in the family. I've grown to truly see MAN-HOOD in a different light the older I've gotten. Going to work and paying bills are essentially things responsible adults do. Its not the end-all / be-all of becoming a good man/husband/father. Yes making money is essential to everyday life, but we have to understand that just because you have a good job with great benefits, good credit, etc. doesn't make you a good man. You are simply a reliable financial asset. I've learned that you have to truly come to grips with the any trauma from your past in order to become the best version of yourself.
I hope what I've written speaks to you in some way. I want to approach this with the intention of changing at least one person's life in some small way. I want to officially welcome you all to The Gentleman's Guide, where being a true gentleman is the norm.
Have a blessed & prosperous day!